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Creating Whirlpools

I’d been in & out of recovery for over a decade when I was offered a drink one sunny summer afternoon.  The thought was kind, but I declined. My best friend had recently opened my eyes — helping me realize that if I want to experience the best possible life, I have to STOP sabotaging my future with any risky behaviors.  Luckily I listened, for I was screened my very next outpatient group.  This armed me with a stellar performance report from my counselor at an upcoming court appearance, where a new judge was eager to set precedents for anybody not in compliance with the terms of probation.  

That night in the park engrained a vital skill in me- unconditionally trusting my loved ones’ advice whenever in doubt of my own judgment.  After years of burning bridges & wrecking relationships, I’d finally learned how to listen to those I want to keep around- stay out of trouble, and start taking advantage of life’s many blessings.

Oh wait, that’s not how my night went. Last month, when I was offered that first drink, I barely thought twice.  One thing led to another creating a whirlpool of direct consequences, from legal obligations to broken hearts to being forced to find a new apartment. Reset. Button. Pressed. Again.

It seems life has a way of repeating itself when there’s yet a lesson to be learned.

Every day presents the opportunity to create new ripples, and grow from old ones.  I hope to embrace the echoes of my past to steer towards the life that I can look back on and say, wow, I finally got it right.

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The lessons of life which keep us constantly asking ourselves—- what if?

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